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I find the word “cruising” a very fit explanation for the perplexed and, to some extent, ‘mad soul’ in us.Homosexuals are afraid of themselves (personal homophobia) and society is afraid of them as well (public homophobia).” (2) Yet things are changing.We paid and left, chatted a bit more, hailed a taxi and left for our hotel.Our evening dinner was both an authentic moment and a deception; it was real and a pretense; a comfortable yet cautious passing.
Another lesbian friend (in Bulgaria) of hers was forced to resign from her small town teaching job because of rumors that she was gay.Said Soldier in response to George’s dour cautions: “To some extent Sofia is only missing simply the (gay population) size like in Berlin.However, Bulgaria is probably one of the most westernized cultures in Eastern Europe, and for sure, the most western in the Balkans.Homosexuals in Sofia, Bulgaria are not part of the accepted social order yet there are countless legions of them/us participating in the pulse of everyday life in the post communist order of things.
Behind the nice clothes, calm talk and tasty food that evening, each of those gay and lesbian citizens had stories to tell that belie the calm of modern Sofia–stories of rejection, confusion, alienation, discrimination, hiding and fear.And when it’s gone we are even more empty.” He continued, “Deep within we look for a constant partner who can consolidate or strengthen our fragile sense of stability. Plus we (mostly men) can’t resist our eternal passion for variety and keep looking around.