No sex while dating
“Your sole responsibility before having sex is to figure out if he’s interested in YOU or in SEX.” Excellent point and one to never forget.
Whether you're new to the dating scene, a regular player, or jumping back into the game after a long hiatus, the same questions about dating rules apply: How soon do you lean over for that first kiss? And last -- but by no means least -- how do you know when the time is right for sex?
You don’t have to be married to learn immensely from this book.
And, yes, having a healthy sex life is part of all this.
I repeat: Your sole responsibility before having sex is to figure out if he’s interested in YOU or in SEX. This has been my personal policy for the past three years – no committed relationship, no sex – and it’s worked very well for me. Men, I want to hear from you, as well…Oh how timely!
Being newly back on the dating scene I’ve been wrestling with this as not only a personal moral issue but also wanting to know other perspecitves.
The implications of all these factors are big because sex is a deep and powerful form of intimacy. There is a deep energetic connection that bonds two people when they make love. It’s not even that two people shared an act of love with someone, that they most likely hold sacred. That doesn’t mean it’s the magical elixir for all that might be off or dysfunctional in a relationship. If you’ve had a hard day and your hackles are all up towards your partner, yet at the end of the day you go to bed and make love, then the chances are that you will soften towards them and feel closer after making love. What I suggesting is this: if you want to feel more connected to your partner but are allowing squabbles and minor disagreements set your emotional agenda, simply let this anger fall away.
However, there’s no set timetable or finite number of dates that will let you know when it’s time to give it up. That’s what you get for playing by a made-up set of rules. As a woman, your job is not to come up with an arbitrary number of dates, like the U. coming up with a pull out date for our soldiers in Iraq.
I know one woman who was told by an “expert” to wait 10 dates before sleeping with the man she was dating. Your sole responsibility before having sex is to figure out if he’s interested in YOU or in SEX. And if you can’t handle the emotional consequences of making an occasional mistake, you probably shouldn’t sleep with anyone until you’re in a committed relationship.
Keep this in mind too, there are many things you can do that are flirtatious, intimate and nourishing besides just the act of sex.
Foreplay is lots of fun and definitely helps set the tone for better lovemaking.
I’m hoping that you have and/or find the tools in your intimate relationships to foster a deep bond and foundation.